fill up my head with your lovliness, please.

couple songs i'm enjoying lately, hopefully you can aswell


cosmic love-florence and the machine
arrow- tegan and sara
mykonos- fleet foxes
eet- regina spektor
pirouette- lisa mitchell
there is a light that never goes out- the smiths
my night with the prostitute from marseille- beirut
howl-florence and the machine
superhuman touch-athlete
starlet-boy in static
starry eyed-ellie goulding
blood red mood-the xx
little secrets (the amplifya remix)- passion pit
bear-the antlers




keep it interesting, hannah.

man up girl

i had this thing, this thing where all i wanted was to be a people pleaser. i'd say what they wanted to hear, do what they wanted me to do, keep my mouth shut unless i thought the comment was nessecary. and i've been breaking out of it, but it hasn't left be in the greatest spot. i feel like that tag along girl that it's cool if she';s around but i won't seek her out. her opinion doesn't, she's not the first one i'll invites over, she's alright. i always tried to avoid drama, but now, it kills me. You know when someone's doing something wrong, or saying something less than desirable and you're just dying to retalliate, say something that'll hit em hard but you don't just cause you know it'll make then like you less? it happens way too many times lately, it builds up more and more, brewing, bubbling right below the surface. i tell myself to be the bigger person, let it pass, take the high road ect. ect. but sometimes is it nessesary to go for a bit of a low blow to get a little respect?i've had opprtunities to prove myself, the opportunity where it's me and a person one on one and i have the perfect clever yet slightly snarky phrase that'd put emin their place and let them know i'm onto them. but what do i do? i just smile and i revert to the people pleaser ways. then i go home and kick myself for spoiling my chance for respect. if anyone even thinks they can fool me, i'm already one step ahead. there's no such thing as ignorance is bliss with me, my intuition is clear as a bell, although sometimes i wish it wasn't.i love it when people think they're so sly, "oh poor little hannah won't ever know what i did/said, she's so easy to fool", i just sit back and laugh cause im reading em like a book. the frightening thing is that i can honestly see my future, being that perfect little wife, not saying anything when my husband has one too many drinks and smacks me aroud a lil or i find a shade of lipstick i'd never sport on his collar while washing his shirts. i can't be that girl. i know what i want, and i want what i want. it's time to put on my big girl shoes and possibly throw my ultimate desire for acceptance out the door. it's about time.


hannah.



ps. i know you're reading this alex. i love you.

pss- told you i was good at creepin.

i enjoy people.

i don't think we ever spend enough time really appreciating the people that surround us. these are the people we're gonna make memories with have our "firsts" with, tell our secret, make mistakes with, fall in love with. and there's a big possibility we'll never see them after a few years. even if we never plan on keeping contact with these people or have nothing in common with them, i feel every single person we encounter has something they can teach us, good or bad. whether it's how not to act in tough situations, how to be spontaneous, how to draw, how to be a kinder person, how not conduct relationships. everyone has their own fresh perspective on at least one thing, everyone has their "niche" whether they know it or not. so, don't count anyone out.

just be happy, gosh darn it

so, today i was at tim hortons coming out of the washroom when i accedently allmost hit a lady with the door. not exactly a serious crime or end of the world situation, am i right? Well this lady shot me a viciously angry look. the kind of look that takes a whole lotta effort to make. First you have to scowl, squint your eyes real tight, wrinkle your brow and add in a little hmmmffft kinda sound to top it all off. I said sorry and that i never saw her, but would that wipe that horrid look off her face? no way. she was dead set on being grumpy and she stuck to, not varying into nice or event semi not angry even once. why do we insist on being grumpy? i find grumpiness is just a bad habit, the more you practice it, the more you choose reacting in a cruel and grouchy manner, the better you get at it. and before you know it, you find yourself with a perminant frown, multiplied wrinkles invading your face, a lack of hope that the next day will be any better. it's all this vicious cycle that won't stop until we choose happy over sad, kind over cruel, a smile over a frown. maybe it's easier than it actually seems, but it only gets easier once you make it a routine. we all hate the old grouchy teachers at school who seem like they don;t remember what it was like to be a kid, we hate the drama starters and vicious gossips, we hate the bullies and divas. so why do we all act like them? o sure as heck ain't perfect and have my grumpy days, but on those less than appealing days instead of dwelling on my unhappiness i try to shove it out of the way or even stay outta people's way as i can be pretty darn unpleasant if i wanted to. ( sorry if you've had to endure one of those days.) okay. well, that's all i got. so tim hortons lady, just be happy. that frown on your face really isn't the most becoming.